His Girl, My Boy - Anderperry

Chapter One

He was getting to work on his history homework some hours later when Neil came back in. After a few silent awkward moments, Todd made a move.

"So... girlfriend, huh?" He tried to not give Neil the pleasure of hearing his voice crack.

"Yeah!" He seemed so happy, Todd wanted to ball it up like a piece of paper.

"Cool, cool..." He said, full-heartedly hoping Neil would clap back with a 'Just kidding!' or, 'Had you fooled!' It didn't come.

"I think it is cool." The sickening smile Todd saw in front of him killed him. It killed him to know there was someone better. His love had been sitting in Neil's lap for months at that point, since before A Midsummer Night's Dream. 'His play? Our play.' His thoughts were against him, Neil was against him, the world was against him. Todd could not get a break. He didn't even realize he was crying until Neil noticed.

"Todd? Oh my God, Todd! Are you okay?" Neil rushed to Todd's bed, putting an arm around Todd, resulting in another sob.

"No! No, Neil, I'm not okay. I don't get it! How can you find love and keep it? I can't do this anymore Neil, I just can't!"

Todd knew Neil's heart was breaking for him. 'Good, it deserves to.'

"Todd- hey, listen to me, it will be okay," By that point Todd's head was wrapped by Neil's tender hands. "There are plenty of girls who would love to love you, Todd!"

Todd's heart was empty. Completely and utterly so. needing to speak out against this false accusation, he made a little whimper. "N-no, Neil. Not a girl."

Neil could barely register what Todd was saying, but understood it nonetheless. "O-oh. OH."

"You think I'm a freak, right?" Todd didn't give him time for a response. "It's horrible. Absolutely horrible, knowing that if you love someone that much, so much, so hard, they can't- won't love you back. Especially when they're so- so close to your heart. It 's killing me Neil." He broke into a fresh wave of tears. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm so sorry you have to deal with rooming with a good for nothing queer." He buried his head in his pillow, blocking his ears from having to hear any sort of response from Neil Perry. The boy he loved, who didn't yet know he loved him back.